THE YEAR GONE BY

I turned a year old today and just realized that this blog also turns three this month. Though I had been largely inactive in blogosphere, I guess I am back for good. It does feel nice to get back to putting down one’s thoughts and opinions in black and white. That ways, last year has indeed been a year of ‘getting back’ to lots of things I had forgotten or neglected in a wave of melancholy. Why the melancholy is altogether a different matter. As I sit back and think about it, it does gall that I did lose some very precious years wallowing in an ocean of self doubt. Not that I am finally out of it; there are slips and relapses but what makes me really happy is that now I at least know how to deal with such situations. My last birthday had brought with it a new posting, a new phase of life which, at that time, had seemed so daunting. Demanding it has been and also a strain on all the reserves of my physical, mental and emotional strength but, at the same time, it feels nice to realize that I have come out of it pretty unscathed. And in the journey of this past year, with all its personal and professional challenges, I did manage to do certain things I have wanted to do since a long while. I am quite excited that finally I learnt free style swimming. Not that this was the first opportunity. But on all earlier occasions, I couldn't really learn because of paucity of time or some injury or the other. Finally, I did manage to ‘bell the cat’ this summer. It was nothing less than a personal victory. And, I have relished the moments in water under a dazzling, blue summer sky. Trees swaying in sync with the evening breeze, chirping birds and a general quietude at the pool complex did a lot to calm my nerves which invariably get frayed after office hours.

I admit my profession has taken away a lot of my personal space and life has been pretty much hectic and exhausting. But still, it has been a lovely feeling to get back to certain quirks I used to have long back. One of them was listening to music which I had just given up a few years ago. The only gyan on music came from random TV surfing. A few months back, I bought a whole collection of music CDs after a long, long time..and finally resurrected my music system. And as the strains of lovely, soulful music fill up the air these days, I always wonder how I did manage to do without it in the first place.

Of other things, I taught myself to bake breads, to devise new ways of spending quality time with my baby, to leash my temper, to talk nasty with an even tone, and got back to giggling unabashedly and not necessarily in that order.

Basically, it has been quite a journey, a decidedly choppy but one of those where you are glad that all is well that ends well. And I make a birthday wish for myself that the ‘wellness’ factor continues to persist in my journey to attain peace with myself and with surroundings. So, it’s another year to look forward to, to wish myself that all those lovely people who faithfully stand by, through smiles and tears, cheer on!